Living By Yourself

No matter if you’re moving out of your family house for the first time, if you’re moving to a new city or if you’re looking for a new place to live, for example after a breakup with your partner or because your rental agreement ends – living by yourself in an apartment of your own is one of the most common ways of living for students and young professionals. Especially for those, who need a little more tranquility and privacy.

Advantages of Your Own Apartment

If you live alone or if you’re planning to, I don’t have to tell you about the advantages because they’re obvious. You probably need a lot of time for yourself and when you come home after a long day you just want to relax by yourself instead of having to talk to a flatmate, partner or family member. You also want your apartment to be arranged the way you want it (and to stay like this) and you want it to be as clean or messy as you like. You also don’t want a flatmate that might have loud sex and parties in your apartment, even though this might be exactly what you want to, but without disturbances or someone complaining. You want to walk around naked or in your ugliest pajama without getting looks or comments, you want to lie in the bathtub as long as you want to and you want to have breakfast for dinner and dinner for breakfast without having to feel embarrassed about it. It’s obvious why people want to live by themselves.

Disadvantages of Living by Yourself

However, living by yourself also has some disadvantages. Especially when you are not a Rockefeller – living by yourself is usually more expensive than living with your partner or in a flatshare, sometimes even with a lower standard of living. If you just started your first job after college or work in a low income sector, you might not be able to afford a two bedroom flat and therefore and have to content yourself with a studio apartment. This can be cosy, but especially that you have to cook in the same room that you sleep in can be annoying sometimes. Furthermore, even a small studio apartment is often more expensive than a big room in a nice flatshare that has a big kitchen and living room.

But the most common reason why people don’t want live alone is probably the fear of being all by yourself when you actually need someone. This might just be someone who asks you how you day was, but also someone who helps you solve the problem when there is a blackout or washing machine breaks and who makes tea for you when you’re sick.

Does Living Alone Make You Lonely?

However, living alone doesn’t necessarily mean being lonely. You can be even lonelier living with flatmates you dislike or a partner you’re actually not happy with. Living by yourself in a cosy flat you feel comfortable in, where favourite armchair welcomes you when you come home and your favourite teacup is always clean and at the spot you put it, doesn’t sound lonely at all.

So generally spoken, if you live by yourself you’ll be just as lonely as you are, and your living situation might not even change much about it. If you already have a lot of friends in the city you live in or you are the kind of person that makes friends easily, you will definitely not be lonely. Having your own apartment might even make you less lonely because you can invite people over whenever you want without having to take family or flatmates into account.

Living in your own apartment in an area or building where many of your friends live, can also be kind of an “improved” form of living in a flatshare. You don’t have to fight with anyone about cleaning and bathroom hours, but if you need someone for a chat you can just ring next door. But even if your friends don’t live in your area – when you’re living by yourself you are just as lonely as you let yourself be. Especially when you’re an introvert (which might be the reason why you want to live by yourself), you know that being alone doesn’t necessarily mean being lonely and only boring people get bored. Because good books, movies and other indoor hobbies that you can perform without distractions in your own apartment can also be very good company.